Monday, May 24, 2010
It seems like forever since I really felt in control, but in reality it hasn't been that long since I was up at 5:30, (in the wee hours of the morning) doing my exercises, eating healthy and feeling great. Somewhere along the way I got sidetracked, not sure if it was splurging on extra points, grabbing my trigger foods and pretending that this would be the last candy bar I would eat. I'm not sure when I decided that just because my knee was hurting it would be ok to not exercise for awhile. This has been my life for as long as I can remember. How do you restart when you are so mad at yourself for doing the one thing you tell yourself you are not doing again. The only way I can think of is to just forgive yourself and start again. Did you notice I didn't say start over, well that's the good news, I don't have to start over, I have learned to much to have to do that. I am not one that likes to dwell on the past, being introspective is a good thing, but for me it is sometimes just to depressing. I would rather look ahead, plan to do better, and be glad that I can push re-start once again, forgive myself for being weak, get back on track and change the things I can. Being honest, that's the hard part, it's really not that hard to do the right thing, there is freedom in doing the right thing, living your best, taking care of yourself. Don't be fooled by the lies (you hear in your head) They are lies!!! You probably can't eat just one! You probably won't do your exercises when the weather clears up! The truth is I can do this, the truth is I will!