It was a Holiday that turned into Holidays and now I am in a Holidaze!

The kids table

I can't believe it has been a month since I have blogged. Getting ready for Thanksgiving and Christmas has always been one of my favorite times of the year. I love cooking, looking through recipe books, planning my Christmas list. I love it all, even black Friday. I had hoped I could incorporate my healthy recipes into the holiday menu's but it was not to be. I caved, made my usual cornbread dressing, pumpkin bread, and I ate a little bit of everything. Had I only ate like that for one day things would be different, nope I have continued to disregard my menu planning and counting points went completely out the window. I have 15 days until Christmas and 2 more parties to attend. I refuse to throw in the towel, I refuse to quit just because I am struggling. One thing I have noticed in my world, people are not particularly happy to be around someone that is eating healthy and trying to lose weight. I always feel like the odd man out. I really wish I could come to terms with this.

Tonight I am making a crustless pumpkin pie, tomorrow I will eat only what I take for lunch...I will not let this Holidaze over take me any longer.

Birthday Cake

So what do you do when you make your son his favorite meal, Fried Chicken, Mashed Potatoes, and Sliced Tomatoes, and Cole Slaw. Well if you are anything like me, you sit down and eat. I did exactly that. I just didn't eat very much. Then I brought out the cake I had made the night before. I was so proud of myself for not licking the spoon once. Turns out son doesn't like cake, didn't want to eat it or take it with him. So I decided to pack it up and take it to work and give it to my workmates, only by then I had started having a bad day. Cake + bad day = bad choices. So I ate a piece, I didn't even like it. I sulked around for awhile, talked to some friends then I decided to get up and work that cake off. Cake + 45 minutes aerobics = better day!!!

It wasn't the Birthday cake that defeated me (temporarily), it was the attitude.

Attitude check (was all I needed)..Birthdays happen every year...(note to self) next year don't make a cake.

Trick or Treat!

For those of you that have been following me for the the past 6 months, and for those of you that have been following my for most of my life see those candies up there, I bought 5o bags of these little goodies. Last night when all the little goblins came to my door to beg for candy, I gave them popcorn balls (2points) and M&M's. I did not eat one, not one piece of candy all day and all night. This is a first in the history of my life. I did not even want one. I know there will be times when I don't fare so well, lots of holiday's coming up, but for now I am just happy. Learning to live a healthy lifestyle is not always hard, some days are easy and some are not, but I have learned one thing for sure, one day at a time is all it takes. On my way............Hooray!!!

So, I ate an apple!

I am not big on changes, I never have been, but sometimes you just have to make some changes and see if they work. I will start with the glasses. I normally like rimless glasses mainly because it looks like I am not wearing glasses from a distance. It took me forever to get used to those things on my face. So it is as simple as this, when I was getting new glasses the other day, several people (including my husband) said go with these, it's like you're making a statement. So I write the check out and await my new glasses. When we got home I kept thinking about how I hate change so much, obviously staying in the same rut hasn't served me well. So I decided that I would do things I normally would not do. When I walked into the kitchen, I realized I hadn't had anything to eat except for 1 slice of toast that morning. I got so hungry when it dawned on me that I started searching for something good to tide me over until I could prepare something for dinner. There on the table sat a 3 pound bag of apples I had bought for my husband, it's not that I won't eat apples or that I hate them, its just that the only way I like them is either saturated with salt or slathered with peanut butter. I usually peel them and layer them with calories, instead I got one of those shiny apples and washed it off sat down and ate it with the peeling on and only a tiny bit of salt. It was good (Who knew), I have been telling myself for ages I don't like them that way. I may not be big on changes, but changes I will make. They may seem small to you, but they are huge to me. Being healthy, eating healthy has been so rewarding. The benefits are better sleep, better health and maybe these changes will bring some excitement to this otherwise boring life I have landed myself in lately.

I'm mad!!!

I am, I am really upset with myself for giving into my emotions tonight. I made a terrible dinner, it was so bad that I tossed it after 3 bites. I made an effort. My husband ate about 1/4 of his before his hit the disposal. So then I start snacking, snacking and snacking. Who knows how many points I ate. I had such a great 2 days, then one minor disappointment and I just mess it all up. I am in a funk and I can't seem to get over it. I absolutely will not give up, but dang, dang dang this is hard. I am mad....There I said it.

It's Not Rocket Science Y'all...

Well it may not be Rocket Science , but it is a science, one that I am not smart enough to figure out on my own. You would think if they can put a man on the moon, that they could come up with a plan for us to lose weight and keep it off. Yes, there has been tons of research and yes, there have been many plans for losing weight and keeping it off. I found one of those plans, and I know it works, but make no mistake, you must follow the plan. There are so many choices on the plan that works for me ( and that's a good thing) but it can also be the hardest part of eating healthy. There are some things that I have to say no to, I am realizing this the longer I am on this journey. There are also things that I have to say yes to as well.

There really isn't any way I can draw out a plan and just go with it, there are just to many curves in the road. One bad choice sometimes leads me to another, and it takes me awhile to get back on track but there are some things I can do.

I can refuse to give up, when I feel defeated.

I can drag my sad self up and exercise

( even when I am not in the mood).

I can except the fact that this is not a precise science, it is not a magic number on my scale.

I can set goals, and achieve them.

I can plan my meals out, and when I have to, I can change those plans

There are a few things I can't do though,

I can't indulge in foods that ( I simply can't get enough of), I'm not saying I can't eat them, I just can't indulge.

I can't allow myself to believe that this will not require hard work.

I can't quit, that is where I draw the line.

At some point you have to quit saying I think I can, I think I can, and start saying

I know I can, I know I can.

Caution...Trigger foods ahead...

I think I was a little to sure of myself this week, I started out well, hit a speed bump and made a bad choice, then I made another bad choice. The food I chose was not bad, it was good. It was healthy, it was nutritious, it was yummy, but I could not walk away from it. So if something has the equivalent of 3 points and it is very filling, that should be a good thing, but for me it was bad, very very bad. What is 3 X 6? Yeah, its almost my whole days points. I wish the yellow CAUTION TAPE would have been taped all over this food. I am wondering if I am just not going to be able to bake at all (that makes me sad). I can't reason with myself on this one, I hit the skids this week, it was only 2 days and I will not let this get me down. Tomorrow will be better. I will make it so.