Not loving it!

I'm not losing it, and I am Not Loving It!

I have to keep reminding myself I am not a bear in hibernation, and I don't need to eat enough for the whole winter in just 2 days. I do not do good in lock down....

It was a Holiday that turned into Holidays and now I am in a Holidaze!

The kids table

I can't believe it has been a month since I have blogged. Getting ready for Thanksgiving and Christmas has always been one of my favorite times of the year. I love cooking, looking through recipe books, planning my Christmas list. I love it all, even black Friday. I had hoped I could incorporate my healthy recipes into the holiday menu's but it was not to be. I caved, made my usual cornbread dressing, pumpkin bread, and I ate a little bit of everything. Had I only ate like that for one day things would be different, nope I have continued to disregard my menu planning and counting points went completely out the window. I have 15 days until Christmas and 2 more parties to attend. I refuse to throw in the towel, I refuse to quit just because I am struggling. One thing I have noticed in my world, people are not particularly happy to be around someone that is eating healthy and trying to lose weight. I always feel like the odd man out. I really wish I could come to terms with this.

Tonight I am making a crustless pumpkin pie, tomorrow I will eat only what I take for lunch...I will not let this Holidaze over take me any longer.

Birthday Cake

So what do you do when you make your son his favorite meal, Fried Chicken, Mashed Potatoes, and Sliced Tomatoes, and Cole Slaw. Well if you are anything like me, you sit down and eat. I did exactly that. I just didn't eat very much. Then I brought out the cake I had made the night before. I was so proud of myself for not licking the spoon once. Turns out son doesn't like cake, didn't want to eat it or take it with him. So I decided to pack it up and take it to work and give it to my workmates, only by then I had started having a bad day. Cake + bad day = bad choices. So I ate a piece, I didn't even like it. I sulked around for awhile, talked to some friends then I decided to get up and work that cake off. Cake + 45 minutes aerobics = better day!!!

It wasn't the Birthday cake that defeated me (temporarily), it was the attitude.

Attitude check (was all I needed)..Birthdays happen every year...(note to self) next year don't make a cake.

Trick or Treat!

For those of you that have been following me for the the past 6 months, and for those of you that have been following my for most of my life see those candies up there, I bought 5o bags of these little goodies. Last night when all the little goblins came to my door to beg for candy, I gave them popcorn balls (2points) and M&M's. I did not eat one, not one piece of candy all day and all night. This is a first in the history of my life. I did not even want one. I know there will be times when I don't fare so well, lots of holiday's coming up, but for now I am just happy. Learning to live a healthy lifestyle is not always hard, some days are easy and some are not, but I have learned one thing for sure, one day at a time is all it takes. On my way............Hooray!!!

So, I ate an apple!

I am not big on changes, I never have been, but sometimes you just have to make some changes and see if they work. I will start with the glasses. I normally like rimless glasses mainly because it looks like I am not wearing glasses from a distance. It took me forever to get used to those things on my face. So it is as simple as this, when I was getting new glasses the other day, several people (including my husband) said go with these, it's like you're making a statement. So I write the check out and await my new glasses. When we got home I kept thinking about how I hate change so much, obviously staying in the same rut hasn't served me well. So I decided that I would do things I normally would not do. When I walked into the kitchen, I realized I hadn't had anything to eat except for 1 slice of toast that morning. I got so hungry when it dawned on me that I started searching for something good to tide me over until I could prepare something for dinner. There on the table sat a 3 pound bag of apples I had bought for my husband, it's not that I won't eat apples or that I hate them, its just that the only way I like them is either saturated with salt or slathered with peanut butter. I usually peel them and layer them with calories, instead I got one of those shiny apples and washed it off sat down and ate it with the peeling on and only a tiny bit of salt. It was good (Who knew), I have been telling myself for ages I don't like them that way. I may not be big on changes, but changes I will make. They may seem small to you, but they are huge to me. Being healthy, eating healthy has been so rewarding. The benefits are better sleep, better health and maybe these changes will bring some excitement to this otherwise boring life I have landed myself in lately.

I'm mad!!!

I am, I am really upset with myself for giving into my emotions tonight. I made a terrible dinner, it was so bad that I tossed it after 3 bites. I made an effort. My husband ate about 1/4 of his before his hit the disposal. So then I start snacking, snacking and snacking. Who knows how many points I ate. I had such a great 2 days, then one minor disappointment and I just mess it all up. I am in a funk and I can't seem to get over it. I absolutely will not give up, but dang, dang dang this is hard. I am mad....There I said it.

It's Not Rocket Science Y'all...

Well it may not be Rocket Science , but it is a science, one that I am not smart enough to figure out on my own. You would think if they can put a man on the moon, that they could come up with a plan for us to lose weight and keep it off. Yes, there has been tons of research and yes, there have been many plans for losing weight and keeping it off. I found one of those plans, and I know it works, but make no mistake, you must follow the plan. There are so many choices on the plan that works for me ( and that's a good thing) but it can also be the hardest part of eating healthy. There are some things that I have to say no to, I am realizing this the longer I am on this journey. There are also things that I have to say yes to as well.

There really isn't any way I can draw out a plan and just go with it, there are just to many curves in the road. One bad choice sometimes leads me to another, and it takes me awhile to get back on track but there are some things I can do.

I can refuse to give up, when I feel defeated.

I can drag my sad self up and exercise

( even when I am not in the mood).

I can except the fact that this is not a precise science, it is not a magic number on my scale.

I can set goals, and achieve them.

I can plan my meals out, and when I have to, I can change those plans

There are a few things I can't do though,

I can't indulge in foods that ( I simply can't get enough of), I'm not saying I can't eat them, I just can't indulge.

I can't allow myself to believe that this will not require hard work.

I can't quit, that is where I draw the line.

At some point you have to quit saying I think I can, I think I can, and start saying

I know I can, I know I can.

Caution...Trigger foods ahead...

I think I was a little to sure of myself this week, I started out well, hit a speed bump and made a bad choice, then I made another bad choice. The food I chose was not bad, it was good. It was healthy, it was nutritious, it was yummy, but I could not walk away from it. So if something has the equivalent of 3 points and it is very filling, that should be a good thing, but for me it was bad, very very bad. What is 3 X 6? Yeah, its almost my whole days points. I wish the yellow CAUTION TAPE would have been taped all over this food. I am wondering if I am just not going to be able to bake at all (that makes me sad). I can't reason with myself on this one, I hit the skids this week, it was only 2 days and I will not let this get me down. Tomorrow will be better. I will make it so.

Soup's on!

First thing Saturday morning I put one bag of 15 Bean soup on to cook. I followed the instructions on the bag except I did not add ham. The Chicken bouillon flavors it enough. I made a potato base soup next. Just throw everything into the crock pot except the milk. When the potatoes, onions and celery are tender I add the milk. You may want to add a little corn starch, I like mine thin. Salt and pepper to taste.

To this base I add either:

*1 can of Broccoli and Cheese soup

*2% Velveeta Cheese

*Corn.

I made the Chicken based soup and then added the following ingredients:

Rice, Noodles, or White Bean Chicken Chili mix with 2 cups of the 15 Bean soup

When the soups are done just follow the steps below. I now have 35 cups of soup frozen and ready to toss in my lunch bag.

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With the cold weather coming on, I made some chili too and made use of the beans from the 15 Bean Soup!

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Just so you know , this did not take up my entire Saturday. I made a cake for my husband, had my son and his family over for dinner and unfortunately did laundry!

Time to put the chef's hat on.

Oh how I wish my Ji Yeon was here. We always had such fun creating recipes. So since I am missing her I dressed in my Korean Chef clothes. Tomorrow I will be making soups of all kinds. The recipes will be added next week(if the soup passes the taste test). I am shopping for all the ingredients tonight, I am making 4 base soups and then changing them up a bit.

Sunday was my husbands Birthday but we were so busy all week we decided to celebrate it this week-end. I ask him what kind of a Birthday cake he wanted and he asked for a White cake with white frosting, oh my how exciting. I think this will be one cake that won't tempt me.

What a fun week-end grilling steaks, making soups and eating cake!

I love me some Soup!

I love to cook when I have the time, when I have the energy to clean up afterword is a big factor as well, so when I came up with this cook and freeze plan it was perfect for me. An easy way to

Store homemade soup is to Fill up bags, then lay them flat in the freezer. When the bags of soup freeze flat, you’ll be able to pile them up like stacked books for easy, space-saving storage. You can then label them and add the points. This is my non-baking plan of action....Soup!

If you make a soup base, then you can make some variations.

I will start with:

A.Potato soup

1. Potato Corn Chowder

2. Broccoli and Cheese and Potato Soup

B. Chicken Soup

1.Chicken Noodle Soup

2. Chicken and Rice Soup

3.White Chicken Chili

4.Chicken Tortilla Soup

C. Vegetable Soup

1. Vegetable beef Stew

2.Vegetable Bean Soup

D. Chili

1. Stoup (Spaghetti and meat soup)

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I will probably add to my soup list in the future, if you have a favorite waist friendly soup please share it with me in the comments. I will take a picture and share it with you when I start my Soup Kitchen.

Cookies, Cakes, I want to make it I want to bake it.

When it gets nippy outside, I want to bake, I want to cook......... I have always loved this time of the year. Now I must try really hard to find another way......Can I find a different way to enjoy this time of the year. Can I become a master Chef and come up with healthy food, that is sweet and savory. Can I do this? I think so....

ImageChef.com Poetry Blender

What Motivates Me!

My motivation changes from time to time so I will just tell you what motivates me today. In fact it has been one of my primary motivations since I started living healthy. When I first started on this journey I really just wanted to feel good, then somewhere along the way, (maybe after I started feeling better) I started wanting to look better. Some days, even that isn't enough. Some days I have to search for something to motivate me. That is where my bloggy friends come in handy, when I ain't feeling it I just turn to the blogs and most of the time I find something that inspires me to push through. Clothes have never done it for me, I can buy an outfit that is to small hang it up so I can see it and it does absolutely nothing to inspire me. I am not sure if goals even work for me, ( I don't like pressure). What motivates me may not motivate you and you may have to go on your own search, if you do write it down, blog about it, tell someone about it. It helps, I promise.
Next year I will be Sixty, I can barely type that, I just know that I wish it had not taken me this long to decide to live a healthy life. I guess its never to late, so here is to living life to its fullest from this day forward!!!!

Some things I like (no.... love)

Weigh~in Day when I lose weight! Yea!!!!

2.5 Pounds

a total of 34.5lbs.

Edamame, Where have you been all my life? I love this stuff. I especially love "Seapoint Farms" I am not advertising for them, I just love their product. Yum. They are slightly salty, filling and sooo good for you, if you haven't tried them you must.

One more thing I love~ "the journey". The good days are so much better, after I have past through the bad days. Weight Watchers has really been helpful in my life, but I think the thing that has been most helpful to me is finally...... finally realizing that there are so many things out there that taste great, I don't have to be stuck eating food that is terrible and hoping that soon I can dive into that hot fudge sundae, if I want to eat that I do. I just plan for it, and make better choices the rest of the week. It's not that hard really, I just always believed it to be. I choose to lose, I choose to make changes, and sometimes I choose to eat something not so good for me...Then I choose to eat better the next day!

Time off!

Everyone have fun....... I am.

It's gonna happen!

Yesterday I went to a luncheon! I was prepared to be tempted with a great desert, and fully prepared to enjoy some. I ate my sandwich and salad but just looked at the cheese cake and decided to pass! Did I say that? Yep, and to be honest it didn't bother me even a little bit. I walked away with these beautiful flowers and I was very content. When I got back to my office I opted for a Yogurt parfait, and finished my work day feeling really good about myself. When I got home, I told my husband I really didn't want to eat a big dinner so maybe we could just eat something light for dinner. We did...... One hour later I was starving....... I had a couple of pieces of dark chocolate, then a Weight Watchers ice cream..... Still starving so I made myself a big bowl of..... Oatmeal....Not just a regular bowl of oatmeal but....

Oatmeal with more chocolate and peanut butter and pecans, and a little coconut! I was so full after that snack my tummy was killing me. I am sure I used at least 12 to 15 of my extra points and I asked myself why I let this happen after such a good day. I didn't feel deprived over the cheesecake at lunch but for some reason I just wanted to splurge! It was good and I could have had 1/4 of it and I would have been content. I guess these things are going to happen. once in a while.

Today is a new day. Today I will move with no regrets. I had the points, I used the points, no big deal. This time I will not beat myself up for indulging!

This is not a piece of cake!

Sometimes I just don't want to choose the healthy option. I would much rather give in and eat that cake. The problem for me is, one piece is never enough. If the cake is in my kitchen, it screams at me just minutes after I have had a piece. It's not even a question of being full, or satisfied, I don't think I have an enough button when it comes to cake.

There is nothing easy about this healthy lifestyle. Today, I didn't want to walk on my lunch break, I wanted to sit down and enjoy my lunch, but instead I made myself get up and go. My mind kept wandering back to my office, and I started to get irritated, I didn't even want to listen to the music that usually lights my fire. I just kept walking, and soon it was not hard or difficult at all. It was easy, it was fun.

Eating cake, is not really unhealthy, but overeating it, is. Thinking and obsessing about it is, and it may take me a little longer to walk away from that cake so, for the time being I will have to have to bake and take (my friends will love me for that).

Yep it's that time of the year, baking cakes is one of my favorite things to do, eating them is next. Anyone out there want to throw some prayers up for me , now is the time.

Sunday....Sweet day of rest!

This has been a good day. I overslept, first time in ages, and it felt so good. I hated to miss church....... but oh how I needed the sleep. My body is not being good to me this week. It is holding on to lost weight, I did everything right, I can only assume my fat loves me. It hates to leave. I am not going to be good to those fat cells this week, maybe if I ignore them they will leave. Wish this week would fly by, I need my 3 day weekend really bad.

This is my menu plan this week:

Monday: Grilled Chicken w/ grilled squash 4 points.....Gonna have a good desert!
Tuesday: Tostados 6 Points
Wednesday: Beef Stroganoff 6 Points
Thursday: Talipa and Potatoes 6 Points
Friday: Grilled Cheese and Tomato Soup 6 Points

Whoo Hoo..... Lets do this.

Somewhere Between Here and There!

I wish I knew the secret that so many people seem to have. It's that between here and there secret. Right here, right now I have the resolve, the desire and all the optimism required to make it to next weeks weigh-in with a great loss. The problem for me is not the "here and now," it's the "there" that gets me every time. Why is it that when I can get up in the morning, I am so ready to take on the day. I prepare my breakfast, get my lunch ready to take to work, I take the meat out of the freezer for dinner and in that moment I'm on top of it all. Then all it takes is one moment of boredom, one moment of unexpected stress for me to realize my resolve is well.... not there anymore. How do I lose it so easily? Why does this keep happening? To be fair, I have not lost sight completely since I started this journey of eating healthy. I just feel like I go two steps forward only to find that I am also going one step backwards. It frustrates me that I have a hard time even making it one week without a setback. How does one get the mindset of a trainer, how does one set a goal and move toward that goal with out flinching. I am losing, and even though I want to blame my old age, my sluggish metabolism, I would get to my goal so much quicker if I could I could get from here to there. Oh well!

Planning ahead.........

I am not a gourmet cook, if I can't get my meal cooked fast it drives me crazy. I don't have a ton of patients, and the kitchen is not my favorite place. I am also not rich, but if you want to eat healthy you better plan on using a little bit more money on the food budjet. I read blogs everyday from people on the same journey as me, for the most part they are helpful, but almost everyday I see a recipe, or a new product that is just the best ever, and of course I can't rest until I track it down. I went to every store within a 40 mile radius to find those "sandwich thins". They are good, but in my mind they were going to make this whole process easier. That is probably the one thing I strive for the most, easy, easier or easiest. This new lifestyle is not easy. I am always looking for ways to make things easier. If you have any tips please share them with me and save me some time searching.

So that is it. Now you know I am Fast, Cheap and Easy!!

Post it!

When we first began having International students stay in our home while they were studying English at our university, I would put post it notes all over the house. On the mirror, on the door, on the refrigerator. The notes were just words written in English. They knew what a door was, and a mirror, but remembering how to say it in English was not easy. It made it easier to remember what they already knew. It dawned on me the other day, that I knew what to do to maintain my healthy lifestyle, but sometimes, I need to be reminded. So these are my post it notes.

I think I'm tired, I am tired. I worked all day, most of it sitting at my desk. I walk or exercise during my breaks, and lunch, but when I get home I just want to sit down and do more of what I did all day. Sit! I know I need to move a little but I just can't seem to remember to do it. When I was younger my mom used to tell me to go to school, and if I felt bad after I got there I could come home. I never did. The same goes for exercising, when I start it, I enjoy it. I feel better. I don't quit.

I am usually my own worst enemy. I am the only one that says...you look fat in that...I can't believe you ate that...Why are you so lazy... The truth is most of the time I am doing good. Most of the time I feel good about myself. The problem is I do still hear that voice that says those negative things, I probably always will, so I will have to remind myself, until it is second nature. I may even have to make another post it that says DON'T IGNORE THE POST-ITS.....

I danced!

Yes I did.

I had my hair highlighted!

I made it through a busy work day.

I talked to an old friend ( she isn't old). I miss her.

I found out someone I love is going to have a boy!

I walked with my husband, not far but it was a walk.

I danced, yes I did. I danced while I sat at my desk, when I was waiting for the color to set in my hair, and in my heart I danced.

Sometimes I want to dance....

I don't want to deal with the problems that always seem to find me...I want to dance
I don't want to get an invitation to everyone's problems......I want to dance
I don't want to think about the mistakes that I have made....... I want to dance
I don't want to think about an uncertain future...... I want to dance

I don't' want to.....but sometimes I have too. I hate it when my pretend life get interrupted by any of the above. My favorite saying is:

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass......It's about learning to dance in the rain."

I want to dance, even when my heart is broken, or even if I am frustrated by seeing someones life that is in ruin. I want to deal with my life, my choices with honesty, not pretending that everything is ok, and later realize that I have broken my pretender. I always try to fix things in my life so that I can function at my best. When everything is in its place, I can pretend that all is well. When I can't fix it, I eat, I cry, I have a hard time motivating myself. I don't want to wait, so tomorrow I will dance. I will!

Like eating in a Mexican Restaurant

I felt like I was eating in a Mexican restaurant today, and I made it myself. Yum, so good this recipe gets a 4 star rating. It was cheesy, and spicy and very filling.

Baked Tostado
1 tostado shell
2 T. Salsa
1oz. lean cooked ground beef
¼ cup rice
¼ cup black beans
¼ cup green enchilada sauce
2 oz. 2% cheese
Layer the items on the Tostado shell using the green enchilada sauce then cheese last. Bake covered for 20 minutes, then uncover for last 5 minutes.
Very good.

I served it with black beans and rice with just 1 Tablespoon grated cheese.

Un-Packed

The little train that could!

Happy Face! I am all un-packed. Yep I have everything put away including those ugly pounds I packed on during my vacation.

Whoo Hoo!

No big post today it is Saturday so I am going to play!!!!

Black Bean Soup and Changes are coming!

Easiest Black Bean Soup Ever

2 cans Back Beans

1 cup salsa (I used Peach Salsa)

1 can Chicken Broth

Blend one can of drained and rinsed Black beans with salsa and Chicken Broth. Rinse the other can of Black Beans and add the the blended beans mixture. Heat, add a dollop of Sour Cream and enjoy. Very low in points. One cups was only 2.5 points.

Recess is over.

I am not trying to kid anyone, I have tried to eat healthy and exercise more. I have succeeded much of the time, but I have not made this my top priority. It really has been relatively easy for me, so now I am ready to kick it up a notch. Recess is over, I am ready to get serious, lose some pounds and step out of my comfort zone. Not knowing exactly what direction this will lead me into makes me very uncomfortable, but it's gonna be worth it. I want to surprise myself, I want to do things I thought I couldn't do. I want to do things, I don't like to do, and I want to learn to like those things. I have a list, not sure I want to post my list yet, I am sure my list will change, some things I will keep, some I will ditch, but one thing is for sure and for certain..... Things are about to change.

Change #1 Exercise before work. That means getting up earlier. I can do this!

Stay tuned more changes to come....

No! I am not holding my husband captive.

But I am sure he will say I am. Today is "day one" of his healthy eating journey. I will not blog about his journey, but I am sure his will affect me. We have tried this before, and not with good results. I have high hopes this time though, I am no longer trying to entice my husband on yet another diet, but I am going to give him the tools to eat healthier. It all starts with Weight Watchers of course, but more than that, I want him to see the benefits of this lifestyle. He is ready to do this, and I am ready to help ( I think). I really want this to be a good experience, since it will be a "for the rest of our lives thing" and I am preparing myself for not being his jailer. I am sure he will be happy about that. For me the hard part will be not making him my project, and not allowing his success or lack of success to affect my emotions. So on day one I called him to see how he was doing. It appears he is just fine, he ate his lunch I had prepared for him, for breakfast, and he said he would hunt something up when he got home, (insert eye roll here) then laugh. I am afraid this will be one long journey....

Oh Wow!

When I first started blogging I had no idea how this simple act would change my life. My first blog was 128 days ago, I was doing this for me then and I still am, but something happened along the way. I started listening to me, maybe it is just writing it down and reading my own words that makes validating my own thoughts easier for me. There is no one that will ever be a bigger cheerleader for me than myself. I know this, I always have, yet I am the one that listens to the other thoughts (the ones I have allowed to steal my resolve.) I am the one that use to beat myself up for messing up, for eating something really bad for me. I said use to because somewhere during this journey I have stopped doing that. I still get mad at myself and I let myself know it when I overeat to the point of feeling bad, or if I mindlessly eat to fill a void, but I think that eating healthy has become a part of me. When I eat things that are really unhealthy or just to much, like I did on vacation last week, I can't wait to get back to my new habit of feeling good. It's not so much about the weight gain, yes I gained 2.5 pounds in one week, but I just felt bad the entire time. The thing that feels good to me is, I listen to the good thoughts more now. It helps writing them down and reading your own words. I love my blog and I can't wait to see what changes are waiting for me in the future.

I have a bad cold and I don't feel good!
And in three days I am going on a road trip to this place.

So do you think it would be okay to take a break from blogging and counting every point, and calorie that goes into my mouth. I am just tired and I hope I don't do to much damage, but I am going to take a 10 day break. Yikes.... that's a long time, I probably won't eat everything in sight but it is hard enough going on vacation, but when you have no strength to keep at it, I guess the next best thing is to be careful and have fun.....

The Snail

One day, one hour, one minute, one second and one choice at a time, that is all I have to manage. Time is flying by me so fast I can hardly remember what happened last week. I choose in this moment not to worry about how long it is taking me to rid myself of these unwanted pounds. I am awake about 63,000 seconds a day and the choices are never ending, but the fact is I make good choices all the time, and once in a while out of all those choices I make a bad one. Unfortunately depending on the choice I make it can impact me for a day, a week, or my life. Food choices are one of the things that will impact my life forever, so I have to make good choices. The same goes for exercise, I have to choose to get up and move.

So here's to the journey even if it is a snails journey I am destined to take, let it be. I will try to remember this saying “Even the snail reached the ark” I will reach the ark.

One Hundred Ten Days Whoo Hoo!

All of my friends that are dieting along side of me, are losing weight so much faster than me. I don't know why, but I know sometimes it just stinks to finish the race last, but I am starting to see that it is the race, not the finish line that is important. What if no one I knew, was dieting, what if there was no scale, what if there was no race. There is a race though, I make sure of that. Every time some one tells me they lost 3 or 4 pounds I immediately start thinking of ways to improve what I am doing. But short of going on The Biggest Loser, it looks like if I follow the Weight Watchers program it is going to come off one pound at a time.

It has been One Hundred and Ten days, and I have lost 19 pounds. That is a little over 4 pounds a month. Not great, but not bad either. One third of a year, I want to do this 365 days, then I want to start over and do it again. Living healthy is something I don't ever want to stop doing. If I lose 20 pounds the next 4 months, and 20 pounds the next 4 months, then in one year I will reach my goal. Whoo Hoo!
I will probably have to pull this post out and read it from time to time, when I am discouraged, but I do realize this is not a diet, it is my life, this is not a race, it is my life. This year I have lost several Friends, to death. They were all younger than me, so for me, my life is a celebration and I want to live it as healthy and as happily as I can.

Healthy Snacks!

Hello my name is Betty and I'm a grazer. I can only imagine how hard it is to give up alcohol, or drugs, food has its hold on me. I wonder sometimes if I will ever overcome this. I don't enjoy grazing on just anything though. I tend to go for the salty or sweet, or on some days I need something salty first, then I chase it with something sweet and of course and on a really bad day I go back and for until I am full.....or sick. In an attempt to sabotage myself I have to make myself a snack tray each day and leave it on my desk or on my table at home, somewhere I can see it and when I want a snack it will have to come first from my tray. This little muffin tin works perfect. Six 1/2 cup snacks. Most of the snacks are either 1 point, 2 points or zero points. I usually try really hard to put at least 3 zero points snacks in my tin, never more than one 2 point snack.

Here is a list of snacks I like:
Cheese sticks
Apples ( I put the whole apple in one round)
Apricots, dried
Berries (any kind)
Cherries
Cantaloupe
Crackers
Laughing Cow cheese
Pop Corn
Muffin tops (Vitalicious)
orange
Pretzel sticks
Broccoli
Carrots
Celery
Tomatoes
Cucumbers
Pop Corn Clusters
WW Cookies
There are tons more, my goal...... to find healthy snacks, until I overcome my grazing addiction.

No more excuses, so what if it's hot outside!

I am not really very good at adapting to change, but sometimes you just have to do it and find something good in the changes. I work in an office and sit most of the day, so my two breaks and lunch hour have always been a high priority for me to get outside and walk. It is close to an hour of movement, and I love walking on our campus. I have always said, "why do I need a gym, I have high incline walking, stair stepping, and beautiful walkways at my fingertips." My ipod has become my most cherished piece of exercise equipment, but there are times when its just not possible to get out there and walk. When it is raining, or freezing cold, or if it is 100 degrees out side. I was still walking when it was 85 degrees, but when the humidity was bad, I about died. So since I would have to walk to the gym on campus to exercise indoors, that was a big NO, and I can't just sit here at my desk all day long, I decided to buy Leslie Sansone's Walk Slim DVD. Let me tell you, it about kicked my butt. I found a little hiding spot in the back of our very cold equipment room and I just pop the DVD in to my player and "instant gym". I am always freezing when I start out, but about 5 minutes into it I am nice and warm and when I am finished I am sweating up a storm. It's a good thing I share a cubicle with just me :-). I like this change, but I will be happy for the trade off of walking outside again when the weather is nice. I think I get a better workout with the DVD, but I miss my music, and the fresh air.
So whoo hoo for me No More Excuses!

Time to get serious, REALLY!

I have been doing this for 3 months now, and I have only lost 18 pounds, thats not counting the 2 pounds I gained this week either. I know I will lose it this week, but I am frusterated because I really haven't gave it 100%.

Today I walked and jogged 4 miles and when I finished I sang "I feel good, like I knew that I would". It did feel good, and I am so sore at the moment I can hardly move, but I realized, that was 100%. That is what I must do every day. I may not exercise that much every day, but I will try harder to eat right, move more and take one more step toward my goal.

Whoa! Did I eat that?

I have had a stressful week, and I don't do stress very well. I really thought I had a better handle on my eating habits but not so. I planned for eating healthy, I took food with me to my family's home. What I didn't count on was the fact that I would slide right back into the grazing habit that pretty much has always been my Achilles' heel. I am glad I lost 3 pounds last week, because I am not feeling good about this week at all. I tried to get back on track today but I was starving all day, and since I used all my extra points for the next 3 weeks in the last 3 days, I had a hard time today. I drank a green monster for my snack tonight even though I was out of points, I consoled myself with the thought that it was healthy and only 3 points.

On the positive side I did exercise today for 35 minutes. I am hoping that tomorrow I will find my resolve. This weekend I will plan, plan, plan and I will get back my 3 pound weight loss, that I have not officially gained back since my weigh-in is on Saturday. Just being honest. (insert big smile here)

What a blast this is!

Living healthy goes against every thing I have ever experienced. The world I live in, the people I surround myself with, their lifestyle is just like mine has always been, so I want to join in and consume the candy, the cake and the fried foods. I want to but, I don't want to so I am torn should I give in once in a while, or should I constantly be in a battle with myself over this. I have decided that for me, I will join in once in while. I won't turn my nose up and insult the people that love the foods I have always loved as well, but I will put my butt back in the healthy car as soon as I leave the party. It's not about every single meal, its about the 22 other meals that week. I had a great fourth of July, I ate well, and I also ate a few things I shouldn't but I had a blast, and oh yeah I Lost 3 Pounds last week! Yea!!!

In loving memory of my Aunt.

I will be away for the week at the funeral of my Dear Aunt. I hope I will continue to live in a healthy way in spite of the sad days ahead.
God be with you.

Seven days makes one weak!

Good Choices!

I haven't posted for five days, summer is kicking my butt. The heat, the long days, everything has changed and while I am loving these changes, they are constantly requiring me to make quick decisions about my healthy lifestyle. Weekends have always been hard, because of the spontaneity. I was reading this blog the other day at Prior Fat Girl She said something that really stuck with me. She said you DO NO GET THE WEEKEND OFF from being healthy.... This is not a job. For some reason I have been striving to be healthy for five days and the next two days, I have been struggling. I am not getting stronger when I am fighting the same battles every weekend. In fact summer is alot like weekends. I can't wish it away, I wouldn't want to. So I am going to take the rest of the summer as a great learning tool. So on Saturday, another Fourth of July party. I will have to be creative, but I can make this work. I just need to think of foods that make me drool, foods that won't make me sorry that I am the only one in the room trying to swim against the stream. I have had a lot of food that is healthy and fabulous. So here is to each day, Seven of them, when I skip two days I am weaker, when I succeed for seven days it makes a great WEEK.

I am loving losing myself a little at a time.

Oh Yum! Boca Burgers and Peach Salsa. Soooo Good!

Only 4 points Total.

I am so happy with the way things are going with this new healthy living. When I first began, it seemed to go so slow. I was fussy, and irritable because the pounds wern't coming off fast enough. Now I couldn't feel better about things. Each day I feel stronger, and this struggle is teaching me so much. There was a time when I went on vacation, ate whatever I wanted, then found it impossible to get back on track. It was so much easier this time around. I believe it is because I have found the secret. It is in the living, part, the day to day learning to do what is best for my health. Today a co-worker brought brownies, I passed by those brownies at least 10 times, but I never once felt tempted. I brought a Chocolate Chip Banana muffin for Breakfast and they are so good, only 4 points and lots of fiber. Good choices, lead to good days. Today was a good day! [Day 80]

Day Seventy-Nine

When a person reaches my age you would think that some wisdom would automatically be at hand when you need to call on it. Not so. I am finding all the things I have been learning on this journey may not have been correct or maybe these things that make me what I am have been part of my problem all along. Since I don't have the time or inclination to fix everything, and try to relearn all of these fallacies I will try to examine some of my beliefs about my weight loss.

1. Someday I can eat what I want to. --Fact-- I can now, within reason.


2. If I cheat, no one will know. --Fact-- I will know every time I weigh or look in the mirror.


3. Some day this struggle will be over. --Fact--The struggle is my teacher, and I will always be a student.


4. Ignoring it doesn't make it go away.--Fact--This is so true, face it, track it, never ignore it.


5. There is no way to eat healthy on a trip.--Fact-- Planning, makes it possible, not easy, but possible.


6. When I am feeling sorry for myself, indulge.--Fact--indulge in the fresh air, a long walk, some good music, A good book, a little quite time, not food....


7. When I am angry I will feel better if I indulge.--Fact--when I indulge I will be angrier.


8. When I am happy it is OK to celebrate with food. --Fact-- Yes it is OK, just keep track and plan for it.


9. When I reach my goal this diet will be over.--Fact-- This is not a diet, when I reach goal my lifestyle will still be a struggle, but maybe just maybe I will learn to live this healthy lifestyle.


10. Someday I will not have to exercise. --Fact-- Not true, I will always have to exercise, I will always have to maintain this lifestyle, eating healthy, and moving..... everyday!

Today will be my last day to count each day, from now on I will try to remember that on April 10th, I made a decision to live a healthy lifestyle and each day thereafter will be a victory!

There is no excuse!!! Day Seventy-Seven and Seventy-Eight

This is how my day started! 3 points. Great so far.

At some point we realized that we had been so busy we

Forgot to eat. My sister bought a big bag of Almonds with Sea Salt

and I had a couple of handfuls.

We got everything ready for the party and when it finally started I

was starving, we did this party thing all backwards, and had the cake

and ice cream before our meal. So I could not resist. I was starving.

When everyone left, we put the burgers and hot dogs on the grill and

(Katie bar the door) I ate like I had missed 10 meals. I then snacked

the rest of the night.

Sunday wasn't much better, but I got home and made sandwiches with

high fiber bread and baked chips. Tomorrow will be better. It will.

Losing weight and learning to live a healthy life is not user friendly at times. Sometimes I wish I was allergic to all things fattening, maybe then when I was faced with them I would say no thank you with no regrets. It's just hard to go to a party and not eat the cake, oh I know, you can have the cake if you plan for it, but sometimes you have already made a choice that doesn't leave you any more points. So I ate some cake, some ice cream and about 2 hours later I ate a hot dog and Cheetos. I have no idea how many points I consumed but it was way to many. For Seventy Six days I have made good choices, 77 and 78 not so great, but what fun times I had with my family, and I will learn to do better next time.

Day Seventy-Five and Seventy-Six

Happy 86th Birthday Mom!!!

Well summer is here, and I am afraid the day are getting a little to hectic for me, but I am going to try my best to color in the lines this summer even when it gets a little crazy. I will be gon for the weekend and we will be celebrating my Mom's 86'th Birthday. There will probably be lots of fast food and a lot of choices to make. I hope I make the best choice even if my options are less than favorable. Last night I was so tempted to order in pizza, for the big crowd I had over, but instead I grilled chicken and made veggies on the grill. We went go-carting and out for icecream. I am so proud of myself, I only had about 10 licks then I passed it off to dear hubby. Now if I can make it through the weekend. This is my life, not a six month program or goal so I need to see it that way. Just another day, just another weekend.